Being Content in Singleness

It has been said before that he who has a small God has big problems and that he who has a big God has small problems. One of the ways in which we Christ followers tend to “shrink” our God is in our singleness. By saying things like “There’s no way that God could have somebody for me”, or “I want to get married but it’s never going to happen”, in thinking these things we end up disabling God’s power in our lives. I’ve had these same thoughts in my own life and there have been times where I have thought everything would just be better if I weren’t single. But how can I be content in a serious relationship if I’m not content in singleness?

The thing we need to realize is that Jesus is our all in all and that He has a plan for our lives that transcends anything that we could possibly come up with. Jeremiah 29:11 says,”For I know the plans I have for you”, Declares The Lord, “Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” So if The God who created the entire universe says He has good things for you then you better believe it! But it goes back to my opening statement. If you have a small God then you have a Big problems and a Small God is not The God who created the universe.

There are a lot of people out there who don’t believe that God can bring them a spouse. Their reasoning is that God cannot affect free will. I agree that God cannot affect free will, we see this everyday. But there is a huge difference between free will and God’s Will. If a man and a woman are following God’s Will in their lives and it’s God’s plan that they are to be together then their paths will cross in a divine appointment that God has set up. Another way that I like to look at it is through Adam’s eyes. He was the only person on earth. I know sometimes we feel like we’re the only person on earth but in Adam’s case it was the truth. He looked around and saw that all of the animals had partners but he was alone. Now if God can provide for the only man on earth why can’t he do the same for you? Our world is filled with billions of people and God knows each and every person inside and out. He is the ultimate matchmaker.

But what this all goes back to is the fact that you need to be in God’s Will. Before we Christ Followers start thinking about a relationship with a person we need to make sure that our relationship with Christ is in order. Sometimes I think “Well I’ve been walking with The Lord for a while now and growing everyday, when’s it going to happen?” The truth is that God is in control and we cannot see what His plans are for us. Maybe it’s not me but my future spouse that God is building up or maybe He has plans for me in my singleness that I can't follow through when I’m in a relationship. We have no idea what’s going on and that’s why we need to rely on Him and know that His Will is better than ours.

Doubts can really tear you down and when it all comes down to it the root of those doubts is selfishness. Why am I still alone? How come I haven’t met that special someone yet? Why is God doing this to me? All we need to do is put God first in our lives and everything else will fall into place. So in the end we need to be like the apostle Paul and be content no matter if we’re single or if we’re in a relationship. In Philippians 4:11 Paul says “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.” So therefore giving it all to our Lord and savior and trusting in Him is the only way that we can be content in both our singleness and our togetherness.

-Dane