Day 30: There's Still a Plan

When Katie and I first started dating, we lived 607 miles away from each other. I lived near the beach in Florida and she lived on the top of a mountain in Georgia. Long distance relationships can be really difficult and because of the interconnected world we live in today, they have also become much more common. As I can personally attested though, they can work out in the end.

Katie and I used to spend long hours skyping and talking on the phone. We would pick a movie on Netflix and start a countdown over skype so we both could hit play at the same time. We saw each other maybe once a month, if we were lucky, and when we were together there was always that sad looming feeling that one of us would have to leave soon. Knowing when we could see each other again softened the emotional blow a little bit, but it was still so hard to say goodbye.

We both made one thing clear though, we were serious about the relationship and wouldn't let those 600+ miles get in the way of whatever God had planned for us. We had decided after much prayer that when we both had graduated from our respective schools, we would find a place where we could be together. Florida, Georgia, Tennessee, or someplace completely new.

After praying about it and God closing many doors, He gave us an answer. I was going to move to where Katie grew up, Gainesville, GA. At the time I didn't really know why it was going to be Gainesville, GA. I tried to get into UGA to continue my education, but God closed that door too and I was left a bit confused. Katie and I were both blessed to find really good jobs in Gainesville and on December 17th, of that year, I asked her to be my wife.

Things moved quickly from there and we were married on June 2nd of the next year. The next day we arrived at Amelia Island, where we were to spend our honeymoon week. Shortly after getting settled, my phone began to ring; it was my mom. Instantly I was worried. Mom wouldn't have called me on my honeymoon unless it was something extremely important. At first I just thought that maybe she had done it on accident, so I just let it ring. She left a voice mail and she wanted me to call back. I could tell from the urgency and tone that she was upset. My heart sank into my stomach.

When I called back I found out the terrible news that Donna, my mom’s best friend and a woman who was like my second mother to me, had unexpectedly passed away in the night. The day before she had been at our wedding. She was helping as she always did in the background, getting all sorts of things done. She even did my hair (which was looking kind of rough before the service). She was gone...

The Japanese believe that the soul of a man is in his abdomen, rather than in the heart (as other societies generally hold to). After hearing the news, I understood why the Japanese thought this. When you’re dealing with grief, it feels like a weighted emptiness has settled deep inside your belly. Katie and I still had an enjoyable time on Amelia Island, but that terrible feeling in my stomach never really left. Unfortunately, that heavy emptiness was going to visit again much sooner than we had ever hoped. 

     

Six months after we were married, tragedy struck our new family. After what was supposed to be a routine procedure for endometriosis, we learned the terrible news that Kathy (Katie’s mom, my mother-in-law) had stage four cancer. It was a huge shock and surprise to all of us. It’s very difficult for me to talk about any of this. After a short and extremely difficult battle with the disease, she passed away 2 weeks after our first wedding anniversary. Kathy, a woman who had become a great friend to me and a new mother was gone...

I can't write anymore about this....

Looking back to the year before that, I realized that God put us in Gainesville, GA for a reason. We were married quickly for a reason. If we had waited for the average amount of time to wed, it would have been too late for Kathy to be a part of it. School didn't work out for me in Athens for a reason also. I needed to be there for my wife during those difficult times. Both of the jobs that had been provided for us were nearby and they were both very understanding to us about the situation.   

I keep finding more and more pieces of the puzzle. When we got the answer concerning where we were supposed to be, there was no possible way we could have known those things before taking a leap of faith to move here. God sees and understands all of these things when we are only able to gaze upon the scattered and broken fragments to try and make sense of them.

I still don’t understand why these things have happened. There’s no way for me to explain why it’s okay that they did. All I can do is hold onto God and try to glorify Him in catastrophe.  

Through tragedy, Katie and I have missed out on a lot of things that most newly wed couples do in their first year. I know thinking about that has been hard on both of us. But after going through such a difficult year, I believe we have come out of the furnace stronger as a couple. Many married people don’t have to go through things like this until they've been together for quite some time. I mean, Katie’s parents never went through it and my parents have only gone through it once. I think in our short time as a married couple, Katie and I have really come to understand what it really means to love unconditionally and despite circumstances.

Day 29: It’s All Stuff

As I was going through some of my stuff in the office yesterday, I was thinking about how important it was for me to bring all of it up here to Georgia. There were so many things that I would probably never use again. There were also several things that held sentimental value, but they weren't really important enough to hold on to.

It’s just weird because a little over two years ago, I thought differently about it all. I thought I really needed all of those things. It doesn't feel like it sometimes, but we've lived fairly light since we moved here. Even so, there were still boxes and bags filled with things I was able to let go of.

Letting go can be hard sometimes though. I was thinking that very thing as I held an old bull horn that a child had turned into a canteen. I bought it when I was in Brazil from a vendor in the city of Belem. It was cheap and made out of sculpey clay, an old plastic water bottle, and a bull horn. It was one of the many things I had found in office from my time in Brazil. I’m never going to use this, I said to myself. I set it down and took a photo of it with my camera before throwing it in the bag.

I felt a twinge of sadness as I let it go. But really, the memory of that trip is more important to me than the things I brought back. Things are really just things and memories last forever.

Day 28: From The Ashes of Superman 64

Superhero video games have been pretty hit or miss for me. Actually there have been more misses than hits. I remember back in 1999 when I would check every week at the local Gamestop to see if Superman 64 had been released yet. “Next month”, they always said. I was so excited about it! I could not wait to don the red cape and fight crime just like the animated cartoon I was so fond of.

To say that Superman 64 was a huge disappointment would be a MASSIVE understatement. All my dreams of being the man of steel came crashing down on an emotionally distraught 13 year-old. It made my eyeballs leak, just a little. The “game”, and I use that term very loosely, was so hideous that it actually put me off from watching the animated show for a time. Yet I tried to trudge through it, because I had waited so long for the game to come out and I felt like I owed it that much. Still to this day I wish I could take those hours back. I actually can’t talk about it anymore now. I need to go to my happy place...

Well needless to say, I learned a very important lesson that day that all gamers struggle with at some point or another. It’s the fact that games based on movies, TV shows, or books, are generally as much fun as taking a blind cat for a walk. Now of course there are definitely a few exceptions. But it was on that day that I lost all hope for ever playing a truly entertaining superhero game.

I am a huge Batman fan, anyone who knows me well is aware of this fact. So when I heard that Rocksteady Studios was developing a Batman game for the Xbox 360, I instantly had a flood of leftover emotions that could only be blamed on Superman 64. I thought, that COULD be cool, but there’s a 95% chance that it’s going to be bad. Probably not Superman 64 bad, but bad. However, after downloading the demo on Xbox Live, I was proven so very wrong.

In the first five minutes, I felt like Batman. No...I became The Dark Knight himself. I was brawling thugs and swiftly dispatching them (but never killing them, Batman wouldn't do that). I was hiding in the shadows like the embodiment of pure nocturnal fear, taking them out silently one-by-one as their screams were swiftly muffled. It was glorious. It was everything my childhood-self tried to emulate after watching the animated series plus more. More comic book characters, more background story, more twists. And of course The Joker. But not just The Joker, The Joker as portrayed by Mark Hamill. The same voice actors that played Batman and The Joker in the animated TV series (which I was completely addicted to when I was younger), were playing their roles once again in the game.

Two years later Batman was back and the stakes were raised even higher with Arkham City. Arkham City was to the previous game what A New Hope was to Empire Strike Back. It was darker with a more intricate plot and deeper characters. I enjoyed Arkham City with its large open expanses even more than the previous game.

I am currently playing the newest addition to the Arkham chronicles, Arkham Origins. While it is strikingly similar to the Arkham City, I've really been enjoying getting immersed in the world of the caped crusader once again. This last one was developed by an entirely different team, but I think they did a great job and look forward to whatever the next installment is.

All of this just goes to show that even if you've been burned before, it doesn't mean you should always give up on something. If I had decided to never play a superhero game again after playing the worst game ever, then I would have missed out on realizing (in a virtual way) one of my childhood dreams.

Day 27: Weekend

 
Even though it’s been a short work week (and a strange one), I am really looking forward to the weekend. It’s Friday here at work and you can feel it in the air. People are in lighter spirits and you can tell they’re preoccupied thinking about what they want to do over the weekend.

I really want to get some reading done this weekend. It was one of my New Year’s resolutions to read more and I haven’t really done much lately. I started reading Dune a while ago (which I was really enjoying). I feel bad though because I haven’t set aside any time to do that in a while. So why not this weekend?

I also want to try and get some packing done. The upstairs office mainly contains my stuff and it is a royal mess. There are things strewn everywhere and some of it I haven't even touched since I moved up here. It’s going to take some time to go through it all and decide what I can do without and what I should hold on to.

Day 26: Of Ice and Healthcare

The roads were a bit icy this morning and my car was still covered in snow and giant icicles, but I made it into work at the normal time without any major mishaps. Work was kind of crazy though. After being sick last week and missing a day and half this week because of the weather, I had a whole lot of stressful catching up to do.

When I got home today I was glad to see that the snow was still there to greet me. I spent an hour and a half on the phone being transferred from person to person trying to get some insurance stuff worked out. I've spent 6+ hours this week alone trying to get a hold of someone. However, because of the southern blizzard and the massive influx of applicants thanks to Obama Care, I have dedicated to memory the 5 classical pieces that blue cross blue shield plays when they put you on hold.

I had 2 mins left before I gave up for tonight when a young girl finally broke through the monotonous music to help me. It only took five minutes and I felt a huge surge of relief once that was over. I needed to talk to them before tomorrow (the end of the month), or else I would have been dropped from the plan for good. I think God is trying to teach me to be more patient.

Day 25: Snow Day

Today has been great. It’s been one of those days where you get a little taste of everything. After last night's snow and the plunging temperature, the roads were coated with a sleek skin of ice. I wasn't too surprised when I found out from my boss that work had been canceled.

Katie and I watched some TV together in the morning while we drank coffee and ate a really great breakfast that she made. The world outside was just as we left it the night before, save for the fact that the sky was a deep blue and not a snowflake was to be seen falling from the sky. I had to wake up and look out the window several times last night to make sure that the snow yesterday was real. It’s interesting how snow makes the world look so much brighter at night.

We geared up and took a short walk outside. I was amazed by the transformation that had occurred from the day before as we got a close-up view of it. The vibrant contrast between the Georgia red clay, that I have come to know and love, and the white snow was dazzlingly brilliant. I haven’t done any photography in a while, but I tried to do it some justice while we were out.

We walked along the trail that goes behind our house for a little while, soaking in every detail. A golden retriever, a father, and a young girl came up behind us as we were exploring. The man was pulling his daughter along behind him on a little sled as the dog was scouting ahead making sure that the path was clear. Small red scratches were visible across her face, but the blood was stymied by the frigid air so she didn't notice. A twinge of guilt spread across the father’s face as he noticed. He then joked about how he let her sleigh down the incline and into the bushes because his wife wasn't there to stop them.

The snow felt strange under my feet and it made an unexpected scrunchy sound, like a flour-filled balloon being pressed between your fingers. It was a dry and powdery snow. Little prints of cats, people, and deer could be seen breaking up the white monotony. I tracked some large clumps of the floury substance into the house. I was disturbed at first, but then I realized that the snow would just melt and turn into water. No real mess. It was then that I decided to call it magic dirt.   

A little later I was able to start and finish our taxes, catch up on the phone with several people, and spend a few hours on hold and then arguing with health insurance providers. These were all things I would normally have done after work, but I did them all during the day thanks to the snow. This was my first real snow day!

Day 24: Let It Snow

So a couple of weeks ago I saw a few flakes fall from the sky and I was quite amazed at the sight of them. Today however, the frozen sky opened up to release its frosty bounty of earth-bound flakes.

Shoes are for babies

I found myself making all sorts of excuses to go to rooms in the building with a window and watch as the heavenly crystals fell to the ground. I even went outside a few times to take some photos of the snow-dusted surroundings.

Sure I’ve seen snow on the ground before in Washington and California, but I’ve never really seen it fall out of the sky like rain in slow motion. It's rather mesmerizing.

Around 2:30 work gave us the okay to head home. The drive back was kind of scary. There was ice all over and I saw at least 4 people slide off the road (I was able to stop and make sure that one elderly gentlemen was okay). But fortunately I made it back with only a minimal amount of skidding.

It’s continuing to pour down as I write this. It really is a beautiful sight and it brightened up my day. Thank God for snow and I’m so glad that we get to experience this before we leave our little tree house!

Day 23: Our Tree House

 

After a long weekend of recovery, I ventured out in the cold and decided to go to work this morning. I’m feeling quite a bit better and I think taking it really easy during the weekend helped make that possible.

We’re moving at the end of next month so it’s time to start going through things around the house and deciding whether to pack them or donate them to charity. Katie and I are really going to miss our little town home and some of the memories that we've made here. We have been truly blessed that God provided us with such a great little place to spend our first couple years of marriage.

I love having a fireplace

I thought it was cool when we first started bringing our separate things into the house. It was amazing to see how well they all went together. It was a great visual representation of two separate lives and accumulated items being joined together as one cohesive new family. Katie and I both have a pretty similar sense of style too and we didn't really clash about how to arrange things. Well.....except for maybe when I tried to put giant framed photos of animals and a miniature scale replica of The City of Gondor in the bathrooms. When using the downstairs bathroom we still sometimes refer to it as “going to Gondor.”

The view from our porch

One thing that I've learned about Katie is that she loves to make things very cozy. She is a professional and it has inevitably rubbed off on me. We’ll have the fire glowing in the fireplace and candles strewn all around the house while music plays in the background. A steaming mug of tea or hot cocoa is always within arms reach and good books abound all throughout the house.

We love to share the coziness with other people too by having out-of-towners stay for the weekend or local friends come over for dinner and games.  

Even though we've made some really great memories, in this place above the lake and trees (we call it The Tree House), Katie and I will make wherever we go feel like home.

Day 22: The Dangers of Eating Guacamole

I would strongly urge that you never let guacamole find its delicious green way into your eyeball. Especially if it’s spicy and you have a minor allergic reaction to avocados that generally results in a tingling sensation accompanied by a slight swelling.

Why am I presenting you with this information? Because while I was eating salad last night the unthinkable happened, something impossible actually. Somehow as I was digging into it with my fork, a piece of lettuce launched a glob of the avocado paste in such a perfect angle that it bypassed my glasses and when directly into my cornea.

At first I just closed my eye and reflected upon what had just happened. What the heck was that? I looked down at my half empty plate and deduced that the only thing it could have been was the guacamole. So then my next thought was, if that was guacamole, then it should be burning right now.

I finally opened my eye and was suddenly assaulted by what could only be described as rivers of lava flooding into my eye hole. I could only imagine that my eye began to glow a fiery red as I rapidly blinked trying to get rid of the searing pain that was decimating my ocular sphere. The Eye of Sauron was deeply planted into my skull, shining a red beam of light as it scanned back and forth looking for nasty little hobbitses.

I blurted out what had happened to Katie as I leaped up from the table and like a mythical cyclops guided myself with my good eye to the kitchen sink. The cool water stung almost as much as the foreign paste as I let it rinse thoroughly.

For hours afterward my eye still stung and even this morning it is still a bit swollen. May this cautionary tale serve you well the next time you attempt the dangerous task of eating guacamole or any other Mexican food.

Day 21: Photo Chop Shop

Today has been strange to say the least. I finally got about 4 hours of good sleep last night and even slept in a little bit. Most of today has been kind of a blur though. Katie made us an amazing breakfast and coffee. Cheese and avocado toast bites with eggs and bacon. But then I took NyQuil and got on a crazy Photoshop kick. I started photoshopping everything and everybody. It was the only thing I could focus on and Katie had to break me from it after about 7 hours.

I may have destroyed some relationships and created new ones with my digitally altered monstrosities. Here are a few.